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Is Google having a laught at us.. Google Gulp? While they are unable to provide answers to questions about what Caffeine is or even when it will be fully integrated, they are able to distract us with some clean humour and even take a jab at internet users.
Google Gulp is a product range of four drinks all designed to make Google's mission of "organizing the world's information and making it useful and accessible to users" a bit easier. This is achieved by improving the mental abilities of the user - after all, "any piece of information's usefulness derives form the cognitive ability of the user who's using it".
The Gulped Site also pokes some self-deprecating fun at Google's own viral marketing strategies - like releasing Gmail only to those who have been invited by current Gmail subscribers. The site regretfully tells you that you can only get a Gulp if you already have a gulp cap. "How to get a Gulp Cap? Well, if you know someone who's already been 'gulped' they can give you one".
Like any good product line, there is a limited variety of flavours - enough to get people interested, but not enough to overwhelm them. Each of the four flavours are based on common health drinks and have humorous hint ti the name - like Beta Carroty, which allows you to "be healthy without actually going so far as to eat (shudder) vegetables."
(If you're asking yourself whether these are real or not, you should probably hope they are.)
There is, of course, a bit of a true message hidden in all of this. On the FAQs page, far below jokes about popping caps sending wireless signals that indicate irrevocable acceptance of Google Gulp Terms and Conditions, is an arrow aimed at the heart of worrying webbers . . .
FAQ 11. When will you take Google Gulp out of beta? Could easily read, When will Google Caffeine be fully launched?
And the answer is . . .
"Man, if you pressure us, you just drive us away. We'll commit when we're ready, okay? Besides, what's so great about taking things out of beta? It ruins all the romance, the challenge, the possibilities, the right to explore. Carpe diem, ya know? Maybe we're jaded, but we've seen all these other companies leap headlong into 1.0, thinking their product is exactly what they've been dreaming of all their lives, that everything is perfect and hunky-dory - and the next thing you know some vanilla copycat release from Redmond is kicking their butt, the Board is holding emergency meetings and the CEO is on CNBC blathering sweatily about "a new direction" and "getting back to basics." No thanks we enjoy freedom."
You can gulp for yourself at http://www.google.com/googlegulp/index.html
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